Sotto Voce

Saw "Ms Congeniality 2 : Armed & Fabulous" a couple of nights ago. Not having seen the first flick (yeah, just missed it somehow….), but having seen umpteen trailers (or as our Yank friends call ‘em, teasers)… spots, previews, whatever… thought it might be some good candyfloss-type fun….. OHMYGOD!!! What a complete and utter waste of time, money, brain-cells….. Sandra Bullock looks 47 years old, her sidekick (henchwoman?) is a total psychotic – a case for female infanticide, if I ever saw one, and a completely inane plot (if it were insane, I would’ve probably liked it!)….. the obligatory gay character… Joel the stylist… was totally cool though…. "Debriefing? Sure!!! But I’m more of a boxers kinda guy!"…. weak, I know… but then by this time you’re thankful for whatever positives you can extract from the experience…..

To repent, I watched "Taxi Driver" last nite…. and got even more depressed….. this is the same guy who made "The Aviator"???…. Marty… you sold out to the studios man!…. I mean.. whatta flick (Taxi Driver, that is)… the best depiction of urban angst and loneliness I’ve ever seen… apart from my own life anyway!…..

Have been a devotee of American Idol this season….. these folks are talented man!…. (our Indian Idol… whatshisname… Abhijit… is a complete jackass in comparison)…. and Simon Cowell rocks!!!!!…. A couple of weeks ago, he says to Constantine Maroulis: "your performance was like, if one ordered a guard dog, and instead of a rottweiler, there was a poodle in a leather jacket at the door"….. !!! Awesome!! I think he makes these up beforehand… and those of you who think Bo Bice is a total dude… and that Fedorov and Savol are total frauds…. hang in there!!! ‘Twas sad to see Nadia go this week though…. I think Savol or Fedorov should’ve been booted out…. but then I guess…. Fedorov caters to the lowest common denominator: pre-pubescent girls!…

Got hold of a William book.. remember?.. William by Richmal Crompton….. "William and the Brains Trust"…. as usual, totally hilarious and terribly nostalgic…. also just finished "The Power of the Sword" by Wilbur Smith…. ok… ok… so its pulp… sue me!… Must’ve read all his books at least twice…. who else writes of a time when men were men and sex was rough?… and women’s posteriors were likened to ostrich eggs!… though I must say .. it’s one of his weaker efforts…. just a kinda filler between "A Sparrow Falls" and "Rage"…. but isn’t Shasa Courtney the coolest character this side of … er… Zouga Ballantyne?….

Been a busy month…. just finished reading "Pundits from Pakistan" by Rahul Bhattacharya (columnist with Wisden Asia Cricket magazine). Excellent piece of work, especially for someone who’s just 26…. the book is about India’s kick-ass cricket tour to Pakistan in 2004 and is a kick-ass piece of work… reads more like a travelogue than a cricket tour diary which mostly are ghosted pieces of junk hastily knocked together to make a quick buck… what I really liked about this baby is that it is completely unpretentious….. and quirkily humorous…. this dude has a future!!

Have also got hold of "The Shawshank Redemption" by Stephen King…. plan to start reading tonight… I am rediscovering King of late… just re-read "Cujo"… "Christine"…. and "It" …. the last one is a behemoth of a book…. keeps you hooked and riveted and … I must admit… just a little jumpy… until the last 30 pages or so… when it collapses under the weight of its own ambition…. goes totally awry man… but until you get there, one hell of a ride!… what I really like about King is the bells & whistles he tacks on to his writing…. like the advertising-related sub-plot in "Cujo"… you could say its irrelevant but hey!… still is damn interesting…. and like the device of starting every chapter in "Christine" with a fragment of a lyric from rock n” roll songs to do with cars…. the dood’s good!!!

Saw "Patton" last night…. total tour de force performance by George C. Scott…. if there was ever a character that eclipsed the entire movie… this is it…. and that opening speech!! WOW…!!!

Rediscovered the joys of Tia Maria over ice along with with a nice Havana this last weekend. 3 cubes of ice… pour 30 ml of the liqueur over them… a little shake and stir… light the cigar… dim the lights… put on some Pachelbel…. sit back and relax… and enjoy the sweetness as it engulfs you…..

there definitely is something to be said for a hedonistic lifestyle….. !!

Just finished reading The Rule of Four …… a Da Vinci Code takeoff…. only, much better. Ian Caldwell and Dustin Thomason have managed to spin a much more plausible yarn, with a touch of whimsy about it…. I was not too impressed with the Da Vinci Code anyway, but this book is definitely much better.

However, if you do want to immerse yourself in Renaissance-based fiction, then Umberto Eco is still THE MAN… "The Name of the Rose" and "Focault”s Pendulum"… and best part: just bone up on some of the more obscure references and you have enough ammunition to bore the socks off anyone at a pretentious party! Lock and load baby!!!!

All this talk about the Renaissance, cloisters and monks led me to think…. about rum…. (Renaissance – monks – old monks – rum!) … recently got hold of a bottle of Old Monk Gold Reserve… and must say… ”tis the smoothest dark rum I”ve had…. beats Bacardi Reserva hands down….. Its got the definitive Old Monk flavour, without the bite…. goes down like a dream…. get some!!!!

I have been observing this very interesting (at least to myself!) trend in my inebriated behaviour over the years….

when I started off drinking as a young boy, I was kinda the aggressive drunk… not very, but definitely slightly bellicose….

then I progressed (or regressed is perhaps a better choice) to the excitable drunk … mostly in B-School…. somewhat like the jumping jack variety…..

the Mumbai years were characterised by the sentimental, whingeing, sad sack phase… with interludes of exceeding embarrassment….. (my friends and drinking buds from Mumbai know this, of course!)….

nowadays, I am your garden variety happy drunk…. the chap who is slumped quietly in the corner, pondering over seriously existentialist questions (what is holding that babe”s dress together? who gives a flying fu*k if the water supply in south delhi goes up from 3 hours to 3.5 hours a day?), all the while with a beatific smile on his face….

Was flippin channels just now and caught one of those celebrity paparazzi shows on AXN …. shot of paris hilton and some other vacuous hieress babe called kimberley stewart on two choppers on a red carpet… preening, wearing miniskirts… some dude starts the stewart babe’s chopper… she pumps the throttle inadvertently….. and takes off…. you can see the panic on her face….. and falls flat on her pretty white a*s within 10 feet….. hilarious….. there is a god… and justice in this world!!!!…